I don’t know what to think of that, and maybe I rather not think about it at all. Maybe I shouldn’t have played those stupid games that everyone plays. But, when the pattern repeats itself on numerous occasions, repeats you can’t help but wonder.
Anyway, below are the thought process I have held onto that has help me deal with this 3 month cycle of dating: – You can’t make anyone do anything they don’t want to: if someone doesn’t want to be with you there is no convincing him into it.
You’re done with the bar scene and you’re very much interested in settling down to have a family of your own. Well, if you’re born in 1971, you’re part of Generation X. Your friends are buying their first houses and having their first kids. Maybe he’ll still be vigorous enough to keep up with your active lifestyle. Next, since you can’t convince someone to date an older man, stop trying.
And then you, the 36-year-old woman, post your profile, and what happens? It doesn’t stop older men from writing, but at least you don’t have to explain yourself to a man who doesn’t want to hear your perfectly valid explanation. But you must understand that any woman you desire online has choices. She can go out with a cute, successful man who is 35. To find out who IS interested, try Match.com’s Reverse Match.
Maybe subconsciously this is all I have ever been ready for? Or, have I been missing something to prevent the long term commitment I am seeking?
“Sam” ________________________________________ Dear Sam, To avoid finding yourself in this situation, I am going to tell you loudly to STOP what you are doing and step back s-l-o-w-l-y. If you try to avoid one of the stages, problems may develop in the relationship, which may result in you or your partner ending the relationship.
Doing this demonstrates to your partner that you are caring, patient and supportive.
Too needy or too distance will drive the person further away.
However, what might be interesting to note is that all these guys went on to have serious relationships after me. Maybe we shouldn’t have gotten involved with each other in the first place. It seems like the minute it’s more painful than fun, you get out.
I have been in the “dating” world for the last 10-years now, and I have not much luck keeping a man in my life for more than a 3-month relationship.
Various reasons for this, all BS, but reasons nonetheless — or excuses rather.
People often describe this stage as feeling physically attracted or infatuated with the other person.
Because two people are having fun and really attracted to each other.